#its hard to ask for help always
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tips on drawing hair?
tried to make a little explanation of the two ways I like to draw hair, blocky and flowy!
sorry my examples are terrible LOL but that is kind of how I visualize things in my Mind Palace. for blockier shapes of hair I think of a sheet of fabric or a sheet of paper that's been cut into big strands. for flowier hair it's more like water flowing in every direction and it's more homogenous and fluffy in how it moves...am I making any sense!!!!!!
wavy hair is the easiest to me since nearly any shape you come up with can work, it's just a little soft serve shape 8)
#as always whenever i reply to these asks i must remind you all im absolute ass at teaching and explaining#everything is so abstract in my mind in a way that i get it...but its hard to verbalize lol#I HOPE IT HELPS EVEN IF I MAKE NO CENTS!!!!!!
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zonked out on the dog bed snoring up a storm. you come over and rub the soft spot on the top of my nose. i let out the most contented sigh
#blllllaggggh busiest doggy everyday of my life and i am exhausted#ye beware of sadposting ahead. more like just need to get thoughts out of my headposting yk. im ok just tired#friend said to me today 'youre always doing something these days jasper when do you rest?'#and i was like huh good question! i dont hahaha. damn#which is not a bad thing always. but my plate is incredibly full and i have no one to help me#im in a really good place. things are happening that ive wanted to happen for years. but i have no time to take care of me#and the ppl who are supposed to take care of me dont. and they let me down everytime i try to ask for it. which im used to#but it doesnt make it any easier. theres just not enough hours in the day and not enough energy in my little doggy body#i used to be able to push myself past the wall of exhaustion. but after my therapy program ik i just can not do that anymore#im really proud of myself. being an adult is hard. im doing everything right. but i just wish i had someone by my side to help me#anyways.#i am a very good boy#yapping#if youre reading this hi im just venting im fine. its just been a long day and i want someone to give me a head massage#jasperbarks
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For sy attendant au - what are SQQ attitude and feelings towards SY, if you don't mind me asking?
Because what I read so far hadn't painted him in good light. Like sure - he wants to survive and SY is an key asset in that, but the way he goes around it is... questionable.
so i answered this ask about it but i just realized that i dont think i tagged it with anything so. MY BAD thats my bad
the long and short of it is that sqq is definitely not a good person in this au lol. granted theres less of the overt child abuse because sy is able to stop some of that but sy still is very much a servant to him. one of the better things about this au is that sqq really just sees sy as a means to an end.. there is some attachment to him but sqq really does not really see sy as someone with his own agenda outside of like. living comfortably. its kind of good in a way that like sqq will grant sy a general amount of mobility around the sect because of sy's vague position and he doesnt reeaally care what shen yuan is doing if its not actively doing work for the peak or sqq.
sqq really sees sy as more of like. a political pawn? in a way. like he keeps sy close for appearances around the sect and he does in some way feel like hes doing charity work because by extension of working for him sy is granted a fair amount of power and status. but he doesnt care what shen yuan does in his free time or for fun. sqq is not the worst person of all in this au but he is definitely someone who isnt afraid of using others to help himself. that and like. its definitely a pat on the back for him of being able to say "well you were sent here to take my place and instead of killing you as was my right i HELPED you and i even gave you your own place on this peak and look at you now. youre mingling with some of the best and the brightest that the cultivation world has to offer" like nevermind that he isnt interested in helping sy with his own cultivation lawl
ok that wasnt short at all sorry but sqq is using sy but he also feels like hes helping him a bit. its a pretty unequal give and take so they definitely have an unhealthy relationship. that being said i think sy goes out of his way to misunderstand sqq a lot because he allows his hate of sqq to shape how he sees his actions.. so he doesnt put a lot of effort into actually examining how sqq differs from the book. also now that ive had a lot of time to think on this au i dont really think that sy's end goal in all of this would be to LEAVE as much as it would be he would want an actual firm position and leverage over sqq so he didnt feel so unstable. that and he does feel indebted to sqq. he could probably handle being around the guy if sqq didnt have so much say over his life
#sy attendant au#and when i say being around the guy i mean that shen yuan would snark at him a lot and yell and theyd both get on each others nerves#but shen yuan wouldnt feel compelled to like. actually damage his cultivation or poison his tea#and sqq finds it hard to relate to sy because he literally appeared by a higher being dropping him from another world#and sy is so fundamentally different in his modern beliefs that sqq feels both that hes hardening him up and protecting him by making#him his assistant. to him its kind of like helping a venomous insect and then keeping it in a terrarium to study LOL#and yeah its rly questionable i think its funny if they had a really unhealthy relationship. gay people LOSE!#ok sorry i always say so much but its because i have so much to say.. thanks for asking! i love talking about my aus#svsss#asks
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lmaoooo maffhew wanting the knot immediately and having to wait for sasha to catch up with that is so deeply funny like. this omega is not subtle and you’re not a stupid alpha babe! can only imagine what benny has to say to maffhew about it once he catches on and stops banging his head against a wall
idiots to lovers is always great but especially when its two people who would be hitched with 10 kids by now if they stopped being dumb for a single second like its that easy and yet...
to me they very much fall around the same time (infatuation at first scent if you will) just that sasha takes some time to get there not because he's dumb (okay he's a little dumb) but in the sense that its like "this person is very interested in me, i can see and recognise that but theres so much cognitive dissonance in my brain right now between knowing that intrinsically and finding that hard to believe so i unintentionally play dumb because obviously i'm reading too much into things it cant be me they're interested in haha that'd crazy but they're being awfully touchy and flirty with me wow"
but also it takes two to tango and we have to acknowledge that and this is when i would love to bring up the ways in which this man decides is the best way to go about that because he is a catholic school girlie... there's so much hilarity to be had here especially because his flirting is very uh how you say... a little ass backwards if you will especially considering dynamics
"I make it a point to keep the door closed when we're alone in a room together! That's basically a clear invitation that I'm down to fuck!!! Im basically asking to be ragdolled on his knot!!!"
and Benny just pinches the bridge of his nose like "I don't know how to explain to you in a way you'll understand that not everyone went to Catholic school."
But saying that Sasha does side-eye the door knob heavily when Maffhew goes over to close it the first time and he starts sweating like he just got dragged into a game of 7 Minutes in Heaven he did not sign up for and he's 13 again and oh god he got paired with a really cute girl, and he hasn't even had his first real kiss yet and-
And then absolutely nothing happens because Maffhew is just waiting with a polite expectant smile (because his work here is done, he did the heavy lifting know it's Sasha's turn) and this is when Sasha's dynamic classes training kicks in and he basically scolds himself for even assuming in the first place because this is clearly a show of trust (correct) not an invitation for extra circular activities (incorrect buzzer noise) and it basically becomes "This Omega really trusts me, I'm honoured especially as Pack Leader that I'm able to be so accepted into such a private space with the inherent knowledge that I will not encroach their boundaries whatsoever because consent is verbal, this is not in any way an invitation to take advantage of them this is deep platonic trust I will guard with my life :]"
and if you listen closely you can hear the lovely sounds of Maffhew bashing his head into a wall about how much of a gentleman Sasha is but also COME ONNNNNN... you know... once Maffhew realises what's happening which (looks at my watch) is not due for another few months really
Battle of wills: unstoppable force (maffhews catholic school understanding of dynamic interactions) vs immovable object (overseas alpha cotillion classes)
And if you think it's an Oh! An overseas dynamic thing! It's not. The Euros are watching the horrible car crash in front of them and doing absolutely nothing about it because it's none of their business, but they will stare at it... maybe judge it a bit but definitely are observing from the tall grass.
and I'm also not saying that luosty lundy forsy and bobby have a current running bet of how long it'll take for maffhew to break sasha in but i'm also not not saying that... luosty goaded lundy in the midst of a gossip session ("It has to be 3 months, right?) forsy happened to be around so lundy turned to him for advice ("7 months.") and maybeeee bobby overheard from all the way over from his stall and puts in his two cents for what it's worth ("6. Captain nice but not that nice. Very impatient." "So 3!" "No. Impatience makes him double the time, and wait longer. 6 months.") (lundy finally settles on a good 5 months because he's indecisive)
And Sasha does eventually pick up everything maffhew is throwing down... eventually... and when he does it becomes more so I want to court this omega the way they deserve I will take this slow and romance them sweetly :) *smash cut to maffhew caterwauling like a cat in heat*
but also once again its not like maffhew is helping sasha in any way this is idiot4idiot and benny would like to enjoy the car crash with the euros but unfortunately that's his soulmate, thats his bestie, his littermate from birth who has been weaned on the same teat as they climbed over each other to get to it, the first girl you kissed in your childhood bedroom because somehow you started play fighting on the bed because she was like i could totally pin you down easy and then she does and you always noticed how beautiful she was but shes even more gorgeous when she's pinning your wrists to your hannnah montana duvet you promised yourself youd changed out before she came over but you forget and well she teased you about it and you cant help but giggle about how perfect this all is and it seems that the natural conclusion to this is to taste the strawberry lipgloss of her lips because whats a kiss between besties huh its tacky and sticky and it tastes like summer and just other apt metaphors to put here about the inherent -isms of their relationship that i nearly cant put to words properly other than girls having fun (they are fucking)
and well anyways benny is watching and he has a lot of things to say about how its been proceeding so far
"You should really use your words."
"I am!"
"Right because smelling like a fucking perfume shop in the middle of October is using your words."
"This usually works with most Alphas okay!"
"Sasha isn't most Alphas."
"Tell me about it." Matthew grouses before he peeks over to Sam, looking up from beneath his eyelashes—the exact way he knows both endears him to Sam but also absolutely miffs him all the same, "Worked on you, didn't it?"
"Oh, is that what we're doing right now? We're calling getting a lapful of a preening O in preheat in the middle of a roadie a normal way to go about these things."
"It worked didn't it?" Matthew reiterates.
"It would work better if you use—"
"Okay! Alright!! I get it!!!" He does not.
like benny here is unfortunately an active listening participant in the going ons of the fuckery if not because hes involved by proxy because of maffhew because who else will hold his hair back as he calls him a dumb bitch you know
#ask#i dont think we nearly take enough advantage of maffhew going to a catholic prepatory school#my friend who went to catholic schooling his whole life until highschool (where we met) dropped the bombshell of the door thing on me#to which i went you have to be fucking with me that cant be real and then i was like well i guess its good we're both boys then-#and then he goes oh my mom knows im queer the rule applies to boys too#and i just nervously looked over to the door knob like well uh maybe we should open the door? i dont want your mom to be mad-#and he was like oh shes convinced we've been fucking since we met so this is allowed youre the only boy she lets do this (the door thing)#a couple of years later when he moved out i found out friends weren't allowed over if he was alone in the house but i was the only exceptio#and i felt like the equivalent of a roving tomcat who keeps wandering into the gardens and got the neighbours cat daisy pregnant#i dont think i could ever look that woman in the eye after all that#this is all to say catholic schooling does things to you man#anyways i do have to reiterate every kitty is fucking each other on a normal basis and in an abo au it gets even worse#making our whorehouse a whorehome#ive always said this but flirting with a virgo is like flirting with a brickwall#actually thatd be an insult to the brickwall because at least the brickwall would give you something to work with#the humble virgo looks you in the eyes before they crush your ego with a single word and youre like thank you mistress may i have another#i feel for maffhew i really do#theres just so many funny ways this just goes terribly wrong because both maffhew and sasha are inherently messy people#matthew and sasha on a team outing sat next to each other in a booth and matthew gets a little tipsy and starts rubbing his cheek#on sashas shoulder and sasha is just looking over to benny like please. help. and benny just snorts and blatantly ignores#him as he continues to sip on his beer and sasha just turns to ekky and silently pleads with his eyes. PLEASE. HELP.#ekky huffs and looks away very much not thrilled about being involved in any form whatsoever and hes not gonna change his mind about this#*5 minutes later* and ekky finds himself switching spots with sasha with a cuddly maffhew on his arm and he's a little disgruntled about it#but its very hard to stay upset when maffhew keeps mumbling about how nice he smells and keeps trying to scent him#all over like he has any right to lay a claim when hes been in the pack for such a short time#and yeah okay maybe he preens a little bit at the compliment like just a little#and maybe he does like being treated like a glorified scratching post but matthew doesnt need to know that (matthew knows that)#well anyways
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Can you make a tutorial on how you world build and make ocs? I can't seem to make any people in my brain, but then when I try to come up with environments jobs, beliefs and little details to slowly come up with someone, I think: well I don't really know how people have influenced the world- it's a weird loop
To be honest, I don't think I can! Writing is an extremely personal process. The way I write is directly related to how I process things, what I find important in stories, years of my own analysis of my and other's writing, etc... The way you write will be unique to you, as well. But I can explain how I personally think of it.
The short answer:
Write. Write anything and everything, it's a tool to explore your ideas. Analyze your own writing, and write more. Then, as you discover which ideas you want to develop, write more to explore them more. You won't know what you want otherwise!
The long answer:
I think this kind of loop is common. It's easy to feel like everything needs to be done "at once," because our job as writers is to make elements logically fit with each other for our readers. But as you've discovered, developing multiple elements simultaneously isn't really possible, or at least is extremely difficult.
Personally, when I think of writing, I break it into three major elements; characters, world, and plot. As much as possible every scene explores one or more of these, and as much as possible these three things tie back into what I personally consider most important: theme.
Everything I do is in service of the themes I want to present. Without them my events feel aimless. It can take a while to discover them, but they're the core of my work. You will have to discover what you feel is the core of yours. Analyzing other media helps with this too.
Concepts in your brain exist in a state of infinite potential. But when you start writing you have to start making choices, which removes potential as you move forward... But you have to move forward anyways. If there's ideas you want to explore later, you can always explore them later.
What this ends up meaning, to answer your question, is that I don't think of my characters as "people in my brain" or my worlds as something people have influenced... Not at their core, at least. They are tools that I use to represent specific ideas. Obviously they're also my blorbos, but mostly they're serving a specific narrative purpose.
So above all else... Write. Write, and discover what you're writing about, and then start over and write with that in mind. Keep doing this. But you have to write!
#I wish there were a cleaner answer to this kind of thing#and I also wish that there were a way to answer that didnt feel like 'just do it lol'#but... genuinely you kind of just have to do it!#I find it helps to reframe writing as trying to figure out which ideas I don't like#then if I write anything that feels bad to me#it's not about being a bad writer or anything like that. it's just something I dont want in my story and I delete it.#like if you find yourself naturally coming up with worldbuilding elements. its okay to just start there!#you can start like 'I really want giant mushrooms' and then start thinking about how cool that would be#and like oooh what if there were really cool caves full of mushrooms and all glowy yeaaah#then you start building people from that. colonies of fungal people or something. this is still worldbuilding#then you might think now. whats a plot that could go with this and show off my cool mushrooms.#maybe the mushrooms are all connected and the main one is dying and no one knows why. it's a classic plot.#if you still dont feel like you can find a character in that. keep going! why is it dying? how can it be saved? can it? if not then why?#etc etc etc. when I am writing I actually ltierally write out 101 questions like this as I'm going and then I answer them#and if I cant answer them. then I figure out a different situation that doesnt bring that question up LMFAO#eventually you can decide you want a hero who idfk will replace the big mushroom or something. a sacrifice and immortality simultaneously#then you can be like yeah so my themes are probably about sacrifice. connection to others. love for your community. stuff like that#and then you can go back to your world and say. yeah I think that people should have telepathic communication on some level!#I'm just making all this up right now but I just want to illustrate somehow how this kind of cyclical process can actually be a tool#because it's not about getting it all right at once. its about leaning into the cycle and how it guides you through developing these#anyways idk if this makes any sense. if this doesnt feel like it works for you then it probably literally doesnt#but writing more and analyzing writing more is ALWAYS good#it will never make your writing worse to do those things.#unfortunately (said with all the love in the world) writing is an endless process of learning more about who you are and what you care abou#its wonderful but it's hard and theres no way to skip that process#good luck!#asks#anon#writing stuff#oh also if at any point you go hm. that big thing isnt working for me I think...
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Wait wait I just scrolled by a mutual that reblogged your Godseeker-Comic. Is that an AU? Is there more of this? This is so interesting! I have never seen Godseeker turning to be a part of Void. Mostly just always getting killed by it.
I hope you're doing more with this concept in one way or another because this is a really interesting idea!
ouuu thank you 🥺❤️ its not really an au, its more like my interpretation of a continuation to the embrace the void ending!! :D I think most people are not aware that she canonically doesnt die, and take the ending at face value.... its kind of hard to explain for me since even i am not 100% sure what exactly happens lol but i like to think that theyre perpetually linked or fused together in some weird way. and i feel that this result is pretty intentional from both sides.
Godseeker mentions that they seek gods to "clutch at their greatness and immortality", which i assume that with 'clutch' she means that these traits would be shared with the Godseekers through the "Godly focus" thing. And the knight, besides the fact that it proved its strenght against the local strongest beings, it posesses (via the Void Heart) the void under its will, which is literally said to be an "eternal" force that "denies time", ie immortal.
and this union of sorts would be beneficial for the knight as well, as it can go into Holy Beast mode at just about anytime it wants, which is a really awesome powerup if u ask me. That and also (in my headcanon) it does like her. very much :-)
#hollow knight#the knight hk#godseeker hk#this is also why i made their tag:#symvoidsis#LITERALLY UNION FOR LIFE OF TWO DIFFERENT ORGANISMS!!! BEING OF THE MUTUALISTIC KIND AS ITS BASED ON MUTUAL BENEFIT!!!!#i have soooo many thoughts about them that i really just dont know how to express in drawings#like how she could help on rebuilding hallownest with her ability to build devices out of nothing#her and monomon could be work buddies in this scenario (in this universe it would not have broken the seals btw)#she most definitely knows about leading a whole community out of misery too (land of storms)#and tk as the new monarch (ASSUMING that thats how the king's brand works) would most definitely need that sort of knowledge#as it was raised alone out there on the fucking wastelands it probably doesnt know much about leadership honestly#IDK I JSUT THINK THEY COMPLIMENT EACHOTHER SO WELL I JUST THINK THEYRE NEAT#ITS SUCH AN UNDERRATED DUO IN MY OPINION#'Mostly just always getting killed by it' LIKE FOR FUCKING REALLLLL THOUGH#I ALWAYS JUST SEE HER BEING KILLED OFF IT MAKES ME SO SAD#BEING A GODSEEKER LOVER OVER HERE IS SO HARD#tysm for the ask❤️ btw .i love talking about them hehe
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Any tips for a chronic restarter who desperately wants a forever island but can't seem to stick to one? 😭
Hi!💛 hmm.. haha, this is hard! bc i also see myself as a chronic restarter, im just lucky that i was able to get a switch lite as well as a regular switch and can play both ways tbh! but i was also always so into the idea of the forever island so i really get it. I also used my forever island as a way to restart without restarting by flattening it for a loooong time so i guess a tip could be to not feel pressure and just design your idea of a forever island based on how you like to play? it worked for me and by the time i was designing an island with the intention of never flattening again, i truly knew what i liked and was able to make an island i really love and dont want to change! essentially a forever island in acnh might not be the same thing as a new leaf forever town, but rather an island that reflects the type of gameplay you enjoy! that can be an island theme, a town made for gameplay and completing the museum or maybe just an island you keep bc it has all your favorite villagers💛 i really love this conversation in general tho so feel free to send another more specific ask!(that goes for everyone in general ofc💛)
#this is so hard to answer!#bc we really do all have our own ideas about this game and how we like to play!#but since its also been a thing ive always wanted i like talking about it!#hope this kinda helps but either way feel free to keep this conversation going friends💛#reply#ty for the kind ask💛#acnh forever island
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Does the Hidden City have any therapists Dontron could seek in the future? Because God love em, these kids are trying but they are. *Kids*. And a horrifically traumatized & depressed rat dad
unfortunately they're not registered as hidden city citizens, probably dont have the money for it (it's not like donnie's. uh. capable of doing much right now), and have a history of being arrested and conspiring with criminals (draxum). although ive always kind of imagined draxum would receive a full pardon after the s2 finale and this would eventually be rectified, so there's a possibility! if they ever did it'd probably be around post-movie times. it'd be a whole process but i could definitely see them considering it.
#ask#canary continuity#im sure me being poor doesnt reflect in my writing at all#judging by big mama they definitely are doing some capitalisms down there so i have commentary on it#id imagine being a mutant is difficult when youre not set in the hidden city and are ousted by humans#its a real nasty middle ground. and im sure there's some prejudice from yokai#also mind you therapy is.... a process. and not always helpful#ive had a really traumatic experience with a therapist#its hard to say how effective it would be. its very unprecedented as a situation#and there'd be cycling through therapists too... idk#a lot of stories portray that as a natural conclusion and the best possible one#and that's fine!! but i dont really think its. the angle i wanna go for#especially considering the fact that the hamatos have like soooo many allegories under their belt and POOR is one of them#i mean they are. they are poor#id want to capture that experience as best i can#especially as someone who's gone through it#also its fun to watch them fester in their problems a little bit..... make each other a little worse.... its more narratively interesting
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habeas corpus – detective comics #1086
(ID in alt!)
#loved this back up feature so much and seeing that bruce timm shit made me annoyed enough to actually transcribe it#first the way hes depicted as having to stand trial and ARGUE and fight for the rights of using the coin#rather than it just being a compulsion and something he must do before a decision....#like every time. every time when he's 'leaving it up to chance'—thats a time when harvey won. thats a time when harvey fought for the right#to use the coin and make it at least a 50/50 chance instead of 'crawling away until the hard part is done' like two face pushed for#every single time. regardless of the results regardless of knowing theres only a halfway chance of it actually achieving anything#or lessening the damage two face can/will do. every time hes fighting for and still believing in a fair trial and that everyone deserves on#it isnt him being weak. it isnt him avoiding responsibility. its him fighting and forcing and pushing for it as hes internally at war#with himself 24/7. even when two face wins he doesnt give up & continues to fight for what he believes in despite the injustice done to him#the way he tells Judge Janus that it isnt about HIM (himself!) while defending the right of existence to the jury of other societal rejects#the way he gestures to himself only at the very end. he asks the judge does that sound like anyone he knows and janus replies in two faces#voice but harvey keeps going. he keeps fighting for others. but at the end in actually acknowledging two face being part of him#(and by extension harvey being part of two face) and how harvey is fighting just as much to have a place as two face is#(but more within his own mind & upholding his belief system still despite knowing how it continues to fail them) and just FUCK#and two faces snaps! how theres no jurisprudence system above there either ! just no one will admit it!#how harvey knows!!! look what happened to him when he was doing the right thing!#look how many criminals and mob bosses paid their way out! look how the police are corrupt!#but still believing in it and how a system has to be in place despite being a direct victim of it as well and just GOD#I LOVE YOU GOOD HEARTED AND WANTING TO HELP PEOPLE HARVEY DENT YOU WILL ALWAYS BE FAMOUS TO ME !!!!!!!!#taking away how he genuinely wanted to help people and bring wrongs to rights takes away literally everything hes built on#it takes away the entire fucking tragedy of his character (and in many ways it changes how bruce himself operates and believes because#harvey WAS a good man doing everything by the books. he was trying to bring justice in the 'right way' and believed in the system. he was#what people tell bruce he should be and look where it got him. look how the system failed 'even the good ones' because the system itself is#corrupt. it isnt flawed—it was operated to oppress and thats why it cant just be fixed but must be entirely rebuilt and why bruce must#operate outside of it. it also gives more depth because harvey is one of batmans first and biggest failures. he didnt protect him.#he didnt save his parents as a helpless child (as bruce) but he couldn't save his parents as BATMAN.#it wasnt just random chance like his parents tragedy but this was calculated and something bruce didnt stop. its ALWAYS going to eat at#him if he could of prevented it by telling harvey his identity. by doing something different. by being more prepared or somehow#knowing it was going to happen. harvey is the face of tragedy in so many ways that cant fit in these messy rambly tags but its ALLL!!!!!!!#bc harv was (and still is despite it all! despite two face!) a good man!! because he originally was a glimmer of hope to bruce & the city!!
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Hey babes, sorry I've been dead, but I coulda been literally dead if I had not gone.
I didn't hurt myself and we're still figuring things out. I would love to share but I've already forgotten what I've learned. I hope I get more guidance and time for healing and learning on how to lead my life in a better direction than where I was. But that takes time and effort.
I hope to get some rest, get some support, and get it together. But right now, I don't think it's healthy for me to worry about art in the way I do now. I may not express it here, but trying to maintain my art endeavors/projects while there's so much bullshit going on backstage is not helping me. Especially since I'm not even obligated to do so. But trying to force myself to do something I am currently unable to do will just make me feel worse. I'll follow my dreams and passions one day, but I've been putting off the healing process for years.
So I guess it's better to get better now so I can get the ball rolling again. Why drive on a flat tire?
#i was in there for a week and ill continue partial hospitalization for a few weeks#i hope i learn more and i hope i get specific help to my issues. because whay i learned there didnt directly pertain to me#but having structured daily life felt nice. but it wasnt all relaxing because there were still responisibilites on the outside world#tapping on the window or calling me on the phone. chose the best time for a meltdown. i have taxes and credit card bills to take care of#but if i stress about it now ill jsut be going back to the ER and thats no good. the hospital was so cold dude im glad im home with blankets#this is mr octopus again. im glad i broguh hom to work. i went straight to er from work and if i had no plushie with me#i probably would have stayed longer or be even more mentally unstable and distressed. its good to have comfort items#i dont think i want to know ehat if be like without some kind of companion or grounding item with me. i dont want to imagine me without em#its okay to have a little friend with you. i would be so distraught. everyone loved me there#the nurses the patients the residents yhe social workers the students#mr. octopus made them happy because of his big smile and mine too. the people there did not expect the mass amoutns of stress and depression#in this bubbly happy baby witb a happy pink octopus. one of the patients thought it was the meds the happy pills they gave me#no im jsut naturally like this. or artificially like this. i still dont know how to express or understand my feelings#if what im showing is real or not because i know ill be the happiest in the room wherever i go. maybe its a front or a mask#but when im like that kinda hard to know whats really underneath. they always ask me if im okay but i turn to myself#and its nondescript like ive put a blanket over how i really feel. its weird. the bubbly energy is blinding.#words#mr octopus#mental health#doodles
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I might have OCD actually
#idk i can't tell if its ocd or paranoia#but all my life these “share this text to 10 contacts or your mum will die” always made me unreasonably panicked#and more and more because of posts like “donate now or you are a horrible person” make me deeply unwell#i feel so selfish because i know it's not their fault#im not blaming palestinians reaching out for help more like the people who share the posts and then guilt trip everyone#and i really dont wanna block the tags because it'll make me feel even worse and i still want to be informed#i have so many asks pilling up but idk what to do because I'm useless i can't help in anyway i dont have any reach and no money in my name#and i dont wanna close asks because i do enjoy ask games#but also idk what to do#because when i reply its so hard i feel miserable because i can't help but as soon as i reply i get 20 new ones and it's incredibly overwhel#overwhelming#but when i dont answer my brain is screaming at me “if you dont reply your while family will die in a car crash”#and it's a simple mental image to think of the more asks i answer the more i get the more my brain tells me awful things#I'm sorry to any mutual i may have unfollowed because they shared so many guilt tripping posts i genuinely can't do it anymore#and i feel terrible#and I don't wanna leave Tumblr because it's my only social platform left lmao and thevother ones are all awful its the inly one i like#I'm just not in the right mental state to constantly see “donate or you dont deserve to live even if youre poor” kinda posts#it's not even triggering its just making my “ocd” worse than it ever was#all day long my brian been telling me “you will die today because you didnt answer the asks!!”#it's genuinely horrible idk what to do and eother way i feel like a piece of shit i feel like i dont have the right to feel this way
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i am playing professor layton and the curious village on my ds. very fun!!!
I don't know if i'm very far in because most of the time spent in that game was me being confused and bad at puzzles. it's fun though.
!!! im glad to hear youre enjoying it!! its one of my fav titles and honestly such an underrated series, id love it if more ppl gave it a try!
the puzzles can be difficult but very rewarding!! i used to dread them as a kid but now i find them nice and challenging. the math ones are still hard, but if u speak to Flick at the cafe he'll give you chess puzzles which i think were my favorite ^_^
#its nice because its story driven but gives u enough room to do the puzzles on your own to make progress.. and the rewards like#the gizmos painting pieces and furniture for the minigames are also a nice bonus because it gives u a little extra incentive to solve as#many puzzles as possible!! ngl i didnt know how the hotel room minigame worked but i had fun completing the painting and robot dog#plus the variety and the fact that u dont know which puzzles youre gonna get makes it interesting. and theres no harm if u cant finish or#end up missing some because you can find them in the riddle shack or just do a different one instead and its fine. very cool#i have dyscalculia so the math ones have always been hard for me and id need my brothers help so we'd work on it together#or i'd just search up the answer as a last resort............#actually im gonna save u the trouble. if u get the camera case puzzle the answer is 95. ITS FUCKED UP I KNOW BUT ITS 95#it took me like 2 hours with my brother just to figure that out and i dont want anyone to get a headache from that one ITS FRUSTRATING#ive only played curious village and pandoras box bc its the only ones i had as a kid. replaying pandoras box rn actually!!!#i have cracked versions of unwound future and azran legacy which come after CV and PB BUT my version of unwound future is broken#it freezes on the opening cutscene every time i try to play it which SUCKS bc i really wanna play the games in order. maybe ill emulate it#professor layton#ask#answered#yapping#doodles
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she has a friend nowwww
#oc: yesui#i like the idea that yesui was something of a crytpid at the crystarium#no one knows her she acts weird and shes always going in and out of the tower#also at least three people SWEAR theyve seen her summon a guy made out of pure shadow which is like#hhhhuuh. maybe a good sign?!?!?!?#no... no she's too weird.#but like actually. when ppl try to talk to her she just straight up doesnt realize they're trying to get her attention#bc shes so used to not being able to be seen#or heard for that matter#for a while she didnt see the point in getting to know anyone cuz she was so focused on helping to summon kiril#but she starts warming up to ppl when she realizes theyre genuinely curious about her and are nicies#she has a little crisis like#oh gods. is this normal. are people generally kind to their fellow man#and from then on she's still a cryptid but people are like that's yesui ^^ she does weird magic and is a little scary but she's nice#it also becomes common knowledge that if you ask her for help w something and she says no...#if you ask a second time. she will look like shes trying REALLY HARD to say no. but she will help out#listen its hard for her shes still getting used to the being kind for no personal gain thing#she was stuck in 'i gotta survive above all else' mode for so long its a big change!!#UMMM ANYWAYS.#thats all... shb yesui is good
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I am all about constructive criticism. I mean, how am I supposed to get better at writing/drawing if people won't be honest with me and give me tips to get better. I personally think that people who can't take constructive criticism aren't very bright. How are they supposed to get better at things if they don't listen to others who are just trying to guide them?
Also, I would love some more tips on how to make the shell better. If you are willing, of course. :)
I am horrible at drawing. I usually have to trace things to get a decent drawing. (For instance, I traced like five different things to make Mikey a pony.)
I'm so much better at coloring than I am at drawing. My writing needs work, too, but I'm getting better.
First of all, can I just say that you shouldnt worry about tracing art to improve your own (as long as u aren't posting it as soley your own but thats a whole other rabbit hole) I did too! It helps build ground work for a good understanding of anatomy and poses.
However there are a few holes in tracing. Forst of all it is quite limiting in the outcome of your work, as your art is stuck static in one pose. this can alkost hinder your ability to see things in '3D' and visualise objects for multiple angles. it can also lead to 'skin wrapping' , which i think is the hole you fell into here (and also a term i just made up now)
with the shell, you only coloured it within Mikey's trace lines - this caused the shell to loose a lot of its mass - making it look, quite frankly, not like a shell.
a way to improve on this is to look at more references of Mikey's shell in the show and its shape from different angles. this can help you get a good idea of how it should look, and it is a good idea to practice drawing it from these angles. this will improve your ability to think in a 3D space, (which is so darn hard, but seriously useful)
however, and you may have noticed this yourself, when you add new additions to the figure, the line art just doesnt line up! the line quality is different!
This is because the line you have done for the addition is Your Line. And we love your line.
so lets make the rest of the traced lineart fit into your style, instead of you fitting yours into theirs okay?
You may notice that when you trace art, the line work is just not the same, the lines are shakier than the original and it just doesn't look as good. this is not a reflection of your skill.
It is because, usually, (at least when I did it) you follow the original line so closely that it turns out shaky, probably taking your pen off the page a few times to take a break from the oen stroke. while the original artist did that line in one sweeping stroke.
a way to fix this, and make the line arr cleaner and more you, is to instead use the drawing as a very close reference. for example:
instead of tracing the exact lines of the art, merely trace the general shapes of the art. not only then do you add your own flair and gesture to the drawing, you are then more free to add more shapes to this sketch.
You can still use the reference drawing as closly as you want, but try to focus less on getting the exact lines copied, and more on the general shape. you linework wont be perfect the first time, it might be really messy compared to your usual tracing, and thats fine! you should see some of my sketches before i refine them!
But these will be your lines, theyll be smoother and more gestural, and overtime you will get better control over your penstrokes doing this.
Okay I cant really think of anymore to add here, I hope this helps! i think this was just one big word vomit lol. Keep drawing!! cause no matter what you do, as long as you are actively drawing you are always improving! dont be afraid to push yourself out of you comfort zone! who cares if it doesnt turn out the way you wanted it to? Its your art, You Created That with your Own Hands, and I think that is amazing.
<3
#asks#animal-lover-forever#i really hope this helped#its always hard for me to articulate my thoughts like this lol#YOU ARE GETTING BETTER#YOU ARE ALWAYS GETTING BETTER#art help#i hope#rottmnt#rottmnt mikey#mlp
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🦈2
#even tho it was so hard for me. ofc when u can only communicate via the internet so much is lost i think... sm extra things u need to be#more secure kinda? like physical presence does a lot on its own#but yeah.. ok i actually wrote more but u can only have 30tags per post and safari on ur phone does not tell u when it's stopping so half o#what i wrote just disappeared ._. i cant rmbr what i said... and i mean this is just for myself to vent but grr im so annoyed#yeah just that he was sm more patient than i realized. i just was in the start of learning how to live w my avpd#i wasnt able to do a lot. even if i wanted to. he helped me sm to uncover things in myself to start that thing within me#i just desperately wish i had found him earlier and that i've been this far along in my anti avpd limitation abilities.... truly wish that#so im trying to accept it and just think bc i dont have a choice :') i've never wanted anyone like this and that just is how it is#i will always love him simply bc he is who he is#he's so so cool and amazing to me in so so many ways. and i always loved just how he talks and communicates bc it resonates w me#and there are simply sm details i just adore. but yeah... i probably shouldnt think abt that? i feel like.. it isnt my place to think abt i#but it is what it is but it hurts so incredibly much. will i ever be able to let go of him? the love i couldve experienced? the wonderful#person i couldve been with? will i be able to stop thinking abt all his great qualities and how much i wish he was mine? and all the things#wanna do and talk abt with him? he's just.. he just is .. i cant describe it. it feels like more than just earthly love...#maybe i sound insane or too intense or dramatic or smth but.. it feels so much larger than everything#so i struggle sm with letting go bc i want to touch him and i want to love him and i just want to be with him and experience everything w h#but that isnt my place. i know... why.. have i only ever felt like this w him... what do i do with this?? am i crazy? am i going insane? is#there smth wrong with me?#he is worthy of everything and he is so so wonderful but is there smth wrong w me for being so..#for having love that actually truly is all consuming? what is this... it's scary. esp when i cant unleash it. it's like a wild beast i have#to learn how to tame. and i want to be able to find mutual love too. but i cant force anything. will the universe grant me that?#i cant imagine myself ever being able of letting go of him but if that is what the universe has planned then..#ok im actually starting to sound intense and weird and idk O.O i think i think too much#.. it hurts that i wont get to do all of the things and talk abt all the things i wanna do w him. i'll never get to hug him...#if i could ask for only one thing it'd be one hug from him....#maybe is ound crazy but with all my disorders and feeling disconnected from the world.. and finding someone that makes me feel tethered#and safe and real.. and having to let go bc it just wasnt meant for me... why is the universe so cruel.#in the end i care abt him so much i just want him to be loved. i want him to finally feel loved.#someone else.. someone else without avpd can do that for him. i want him to be oh so so loved and .. yeah.. :(#i wish i couldve loved him as he deserves but .. its not my place. not my place... all i want is to hear his voice and live in his arms
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I've been an absolute emotional wreck since last night due to my narcissist father making me feel less than human so can i..........ask for some reassurance that i'm not an absolute failure of a human being
or pictures of your cats, that would help a lot too
#its been months of dealing with his abuse and last night it left me feeling worse than ever and i am just#really exhausted and mentally broken rn#and i hate asking for reassurance because I always feel like a bother and I should just deal with shit myself until it passes#but when i say last night was bad it was bad and i feel like i am not even meant to be alive that is how that man made me feel#so i just wanna be selfish this one time#and ask for spare kindness because i could really use it right now because my feelings arent going away#no matter how hard im trying to distract myself today and i dont have the strenght to stay like this for a week or more#so yeah#gomen for rambling in the tags im just really#idfk embarrassed and ashamed i dont like asking for help i feel dumb even tho i know its not dumb but yeah#txt
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